The feelings that surface for us after a loss relate to the cause of death and our relationship to that person. If the death was expected we may have had time to say “good-bye”. However, when the death is caused by suicide, sudden illness, homicide or an accident there is no time for “good-bye” or to take care of unfinished business with the individual. These factors tend to complicate the grieving process and intensify the feelings.
Fear is a normal reaction to the sudden and unexpected death of another person because we are confronted with how helpless we are in the face of death and that bad things can happen to us. The universe no longer feels like a safe place. This sense of vulnerability is compounded by the fact that we must go on living without that special person. Since we do not know what this will be like, the future seems uncertain and scary.